Nir Eyal: commitment

Transcript context

…Absolutely. Let's talk and get into it. It's not as exciting as it might sound. I've been married for twenty-two years now. My wife and I found that we weren't being as intimate as we used to be. And this was when I first started writing the book. And part of the problem was that every night, we would go to bed and she would be fondling her iPhone and I would be caressing my iPad. And we weren't being intimate because we were busy playing with our devices as opposed to each other. And so, I started doing this research around Indistractable and I learned about this technique around making an effort pact. And so, what we did, I went to the hardware store and I bought us this $10 outlet timer and this outlet timer, anything you plug into it will turn on or off at a particular time of day or night, whatever you set. And so, in my household, until this very day, every night at 10:00 P.M., my internet router shuts off. So, what does that do? We know that every night, 10:00 P.M., the internet router's going to shut off. So, my daughter knows, my wife knows, I know. I got to get everything done that I need to do online because the internet's going to shut off. Now, could I turn the internet back on? Of course, I could. I could tether, I could go pull out the router and replug it in, but that takes effort. And so, what I've done is if all else fails, if the internal triggers, making time for traction, hacking back, if all else fails, I've inserted a bit of mindfulness in something that I used to be mindless about. Now, I have to ask myself, "Wait a minute. Do I really need to go all that trouble of replugging and unplugging my router or should I do what I said I was going to do, which is get to bed on time and maybe be intimate with my wife?" It's made a world of difference and I'll tell you honestly, Lenny. Now after a few years of doing this, it's become part of our routine. We all know bedtime's at 10:00 P.M. That's when we need to start getting ready for bed. The internet router's going to shut off. We actually don't even need this anymore because it's become part of our routine. So, that's one very cheap tool anyone can use as part of this effort pact. Another thing that I use almost every day, my daughter uses it as well, is this wonderful app called Forest. Do you know Forest? No.…

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